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Sometimes life falls on you and forces you to change shape, to enter your usual structure and revolutionize it. You spread out, you squeeze, you bend over. You smear and withdraw. You change constantly, in an effort to withstand the impact that continues to upset you and that could break and shatter you. But you continue to adapt to that shock force. Didn\’t you know you could take on new shapes? Or rather, you didn\’t know it because you had never tried. Nothing had ever happened before that forced you to invent new forms of yourself. All of this is called resilience. And the fact is that for many of us, in the emergency that the COVID-19 pandemic has brought into our lives, this is exactly what happened: we have become stronger. And maybe even a little better. Why did it happen? How did it happen? What actually happened? And above all, what have we learned and must we learn to keep with us even in quiet times, because it makes us better? This book tries to answer these questions. Starting from what happened in many of our families, reworking the facts, events and salient happenings, resuming the track of those weeks in which the virus forced us to become different from what we had always been, while continuing to remain those of always, these pages want to be a path of resilience and learning. Because what has shocked the world has also changed our way of being family. And it probably made us stronger too. The risk could be, after a great effort, to erase the memory, remove it from us and throw ourselves back into what we were before living through this experience. But in doing so we would be alone in an empty and deserted territory, we would not treasure on the experience given to us to elaborate its meanings and contents. This book starts from that treasure. From what the COVID-19 emergency has left us. And that must never be forgotten. But integrated in our life stories, in our most intimate relationships, in our family relationships.


Alberto Pellai is a doctor and children psychotherapist, is also a researcher at the Bio-Medical department at the Università degli Studi of Milan, where he works on prevention. In 2004 the Italian Ministry of Health  awarded him the silver medal of merit in Public Health. He is the author of many best seller books for parents, teachers, teenagers and children. His books are translated in 10 languages

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